Hope is associated with an expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen. When we hope, we are essentially concentrating on a result. What happens if that result doesn’t occur? Then we may fall into despair, which, according to the dictionary, is the lack of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen. The problem is that we can’t have one without the other. You can’t have darkness without a light to stick it in. If you believe in hope, you will experience moments of despair. That is the truth of the matter. 

I do sometimes struggle with this. I get frustrated when in despair, but I wouldn’t fall into it if I wasn’t such a hopeful and positive person. However, the feeling of disappointment that naturally follows when something you really hoped for ends up not happening is very hard to deal with. 

I have been thinking a lot lately about my hopes and desires and how they affect my day-to-day life. Some of them are good and keep me motivated, but some of them are, quite frankly, holding me back and keeping me from enjoying myself. If I’ve lost hope regarding just one thing, it tends to seep into other areas of my life, and negatively affect other hopes and desires. Why is that? Why can’t I keep things separated? Just drop it and move on? I mean, eventually I will, but why do I let it get to me in the first place? Why is it that one thing can overshadow another? What is wrong with me? 

I recently experienced a huge disappointment, and for days now it has affected me negatively. I know, for certain, that I will feel better soon. I just need to pick myself up and get on with it. I was even sort of expecting this recent occurrence (even though I of course hoped for a different outcome – that is my nature), so I have prepared myself with tons of planned fun this year. This spring is so full of things I have been wanting to do that I won’t even have time to think. That is my coping mechanism, and it always works. My fridge will be bursting with lemonade this year! Even though I am currently searching for a light to stick it in 🙂